Thursday, November 5, 2009

Hair Secrets?

A couple of weeks ago, I caught an Oprah show featuring Chris Rock who was promoting his latest movie.  Because I think he is just about the funniest guy on the planet, I decided to tune it.  Leave it to Chris Rock to find a way to make women and our hair traumas a comedy!

After watching that show, I got to thinking about my own crowning glory. I have spent years fighting with it, trying everything available on the market in the hopes of forcing it to act in a way that Nature had never intended. Years of trying to coax it to curl with old 1980's perms that left my scalp feeling like there were flames shooting out of my head, coloring it crazy shades when I was in my late teens.  BTW, I did this back when it was cool and there were no hair salons that could do this professionally.

We had to find our own colorants and my choice was dark green liquid food coloring which turned my natural dark brown hair a sickening olive green shade. I still remember showing up for work sporting what was considered at the time outrageous hair and having my boss ask what had happened to it.  I loved having this rebellious shade and kept it like that until it eventually faded out.

Years later when I was in my mid 30's, my stylist decided it was time to do a much needed intervention.  My addiction? Perms.  She was happy to continue the coloring for me but the combination of both processes was ruining my super fine hair.  Man that was a toughy for me.  How would I get any body in my hair without a perm?!  Well, after much persuasion, I caved in and passed on the perm.  That's when I discovered foils and highlights!

Right up until my daughter was born, I had kept up the routine of cut, color and foils every six to eight weeks after finally allowing my stick-straight hair to be just that.  So when I heard Chris Rock exclaim with surprise that he had discovered that no white woman has her own natural color, I wanted to stand up and shout, "Look over here.  This IS my natural color!"  Am I the only one out here who hasn't been to the hair salon for months?

It was January when I had my last semi-perm color and foils which would have washed down the drain months ago.  Yes, there are a few gray stands poking through my dark brown hair and it has grown so long, I have to wear it in a ponytail.

No Cut. No Color. No Foils. No Anything except me hacking at my bangs with dull scissors since January.  But guess what!?  I have made my appointment and I'm back in the salon chair next Thursday night!

Hold that Perm, but Cut, Color and Foils, HERE I COME!

So is anyone else brave enough to comment on their own hair secrets and traumas?

29 comments:

blueviolet said...

I pulled out my gray hair for about 3 years until one day I realized there was just too much of it. So, I started to color it and now I'm stuck. Every 6 weeks, I have to color it.

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

I am trying out a new guy tomorrow. My last dude burned my hair with the Japanese. Yes, I have pubic hair on my head..the curse of the Jews. This is a whole blog post on it's own!

Connie K said...

I so remember my perm days LOL !! my mom use to give them to me and the burn oh god what i did to have curly hair ! ugh and now me too just like blueviolet i color my hair every 4 weeks 6 is just to long in between My dad we a full gray head of hair by his 30's so i've been fight the whole gray thing for years and im guilty of Hair extensions i put them in around 3 times a year so i can have long hair !! and then when im board i take them out ! haha Thanks for sharing your secerts !!

Corrie Howe said...

The only thing good about my hair is the natural color. Straight, fine and blah. My secret is that I don't really care...okay, maybe it's not a secret, like I think it is.

Anita said...

No secrets here. I proudly color my hair with over-the-counter Garnier Nutrisse. Coincidentally, I just colored it today. I don't like my salt and pepper roots. I use a light color to get the desired dark brown. Somehow it ends up with a highlighted look. Must be the grays. :)
Also, I haven't seen the movie, but I am somewhat familiar with the hundreds of things that black women do with their hair. I say "their" instead of "our" because I do as little as I can possibly get away with. A flat iron seems to do the trick and a haircut four times a year. And like you, I desperately need a hair cut. You've inspired me to make my appointment. :)

sitting on the mood swing at the playground said...

Chris Rock is a favorite of mine. I was quoting him today! I've been highlighting or coloring my hair forever. I was 19 when I saw my first gray and it's been steady since then.

I was faithful with appointments for cuts and de-graying up until my son was born. Now I think I get it cut a few times a year, have a boring cut and color at home.

elasticwaistbands said...

i'm a fashion product of the 80s and i, too, abused my hair. perms, color, then foils...
with a kid in college and three still at home, who can afford it? salon visits are upwards of $100 to get a good color and cut...so i lock myself in the bathroom and hack at it with scissors myself. color? natural brunette with mo'and mo' gray everyday. wash'n'wear works best for me these days.

kys said...

I was a perm addict, too. My hair has been so flat since about 1990.

My Aimless Infatuation said...

Well,as of last week I got tired of the smooth and sleek look so I am reverting to my old ways. I went and got a perm.....love it,wash,scrunch and go. I had forgotten how much I love curly hair. I will continue color and highlights until all my hair is the color of Paula Deen's and then I will be all natural....love her hair.

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

That is on my list of movies to see but I can imagine what the topics were on...coloring, weaves, natural, etc.

I have only had my hair colored about 4 times in my life. It is damaging to my hair and I'd much rather sport what God gave me, even if some of it is turning gray now.

Black hair can be straight, coarse, curly, twisted, locked, straightened, permed, weavedm braided...it's now become a smorgasbord of preferences. I prefer my hair permed and non-colored.

When I was little, before perms, I would sit while my mom used a straightening comb and pressed my hair straight.

Menopausal New Mom said...

Hi Blue Violet, Just coloring? How lucky is that! I'm lucky that I don't have very much gray or I would not have lasted without a color since January.

Lee, I laugh out loud every time I read your comment. Looking forward to the blog post on your hair!

Connie! I would kill to get hair extensions to thicken up this limp, flat head of hair I have. Lucky, lucky gal!

Corrie, You have hair just like me! I tie it back in a ponytail so it doesn't lay flat on my head. I have those clip in natural hair pieces but since having my daughter, don't wear them. That's all I need is her pulling those out of my head while we are shopping!

Hi Anita, I couldn't imagine my hair could be any flatter, flat iron or not. It is so stick straight and fine, hence the clip in pieces I wrote about above. Glad I inspired you to make an appointment. We all need to be pampered once in a while.

Sitting on the Mood Swing, Isn't that the truth. up until my daughter was born, I was at that salon on time every 6 to 8 weeks. I just can't seem to be bothered anymore. Maybe when she is older, I'll start taking a bit more pride in my appearance and go more often.

Elasticwaistbands, Good point about the expense. I just hack at my bangs, been doing that since I was about 4 so I'm finally getting pretty good at it. For now, the ponytail works best.

Hi Kys, Bet my hair is flatter than yours Lol!

Menopausal New Mom said...

Hi My Aimless Infatuation, took me so long to write my response above, both you and Chocolate Covered Daydreams left comments.

It's been so long since I had a perm, I have no idea what the newer ones are like. Don't tell me you love them or I may fall off my NO PERM wagon Lol!

Hi Chocolate Covered Daydreams, Going to that movie is on my list too. I think Chris Rock is one of the funniest guys of all time. What a nice memory of your mom doing your hair when you were little. Lucky you that you don't need to color your hair!

HeartsMakeFamilies said...

Well I have this really fine hair that usually lies on my head like a limp.. I won't go there lol. I think I watched that show at the same time. Wasn't he talking about going overseas and finding out how much they charge for the hair extensions? I've had my hair colored so many times I can't count. But today.. its my natural color with yes yes white hair sprinkled in the middle. I will some day be solely white. Thank you Grandma. I'll be a natural platinum lol.

Stacey said...

My hairstory is pretty sad. I grew up alternating between looking like Bob Saget, then Pat Benetar until the 8th grade. Then I had the 80's spiral perm with teased up bangs (a la Bon Jovi groupie until the 90's. Started seeing gray when I was 19, have been colouring it ever since. Starting losing it after pregnancies and it happens every six months or so. Went broke a few months ago, now I can't afford anything so I look like crap. This was depressing. lol

mama-face said...

I have hands down the worst hair on the planet; think bad baby hair: and I rely heavily on foils and highlights. It must be damaged for any hope. I miss the the era of the perm. I have a cut and color app't next Wed and I cannot wait.

If you can get a ponytail then I am totally jealous. But i still love ya.

Teresa @ Grammy Girlfriend said...

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Frau said...

I haven't been since July when I was home in Utah. Sometimes it's scary getting it done here with the language barrier and all. I'm trying to hold out until Xmas trip. But it's now or two trips too close together. Perms in the 80-90s oh my I was two inches tall when I had a perm!!

Sincerely, Jenni said...

I get my hair highlighted in the summer time, but other than that, its natural all the way. I wear my hair shorter, and straight, but thanks to good hair product, my hair gets some volume when I keep it short.

Menopausal New Mom said...

Hi Heartsmakefamilies, Yes, Chris headed to India and found that the women there sacrifice their hair to some religious God and then the church sells it off to the highest bidder. Nothing new about exploiting women! I hear ya on the flat, limp hair, that's definitely me too. Not so much the platinum!

Hi Stacey, I had one of those spiral perms too. Got it in grade 12 just before graduation and my mother was horrified! I haven't had anything done to my hair since January, talk about look like crap!

Hi Mama-face, not so fast on taking the crown for the worst hair on the planet! I may have a ponytail, however, my hair is so fine I have to twist the elastic around it about 6 times for it to stay in!

Hi Teresa, thanks for finding me and inviting me over. Will check out your blog!

Hi Frau, I'd be scared to death to get my hair done when there is a language barrier between me and the stylist. I have enough trouble getting a good cut and color when we both speak the same language!

Hi Jenni, you're one of the lucky ones if you can wear short hair and look great. If you have fine hair and can create volume, I want to know what product you're using!

Too Many Hats said...

I flirted with hair color in my twenties, but gave it up as it was time consuming and expensive. Today, I am a natural brunette with more and more gray finding its way to my head. Oh well. I wear my hair long, so there is not much styling needed. I know, I'm boring. However, my teen dd has taken to hair coloring and I get to be the colorist - it is not my favorite thing, but she loves it.

Kimi said...

I totally rocked the perms in the 80/early 90's. I wanted my hair to look exactly like Stars hair in the movie Lost Boys. Man I'm showing some age there, huh.

I color, but I'm cheap so I color at home. And it is close enough to my real color that I don't feel guilty at all tell people it is my real color, lol

Aron Ranen said...

Please take a moment to check out my documentary film BLACK HAIR

It is free at youtube. 6 parts including an update from London, England.

It explores the Korean Take-over of the Black Beauty Supply and Hair biz..

The current situation makes it hard to believe that Madame C.J. Walker once ran the whole thing.

I am not a hater, I am a motivator.

Plus I am a White guy who stumbled upon this, and felt it was so wrong I had to make a film about it.

self-funded film, made from the heart.

Can it be taken back?

Link
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p96aaTSdrAE

Menopausal New Mom said...

Hi Too Many Hats, Yes, I think we all explored with color in our early days, so exciting once we clued in that you didn't have to have a full head of gray to be interested in coloring your hair. I can relate to the dark brown with gray. Hopefully I will have it taken care of this Thursday. Thanks for commenting!

Hey Kimi, If I could figure out how to do GOOD foils at home, I would do my own too. Truth is, I need that couple of hours of pampering every now and then. Don't get much of that chasing a 3 1/2 year old around!

Hi Aron, thanks for the info on your documentary on hair. I will definitely take a look at it when I know I will have some uninterrupted time. Just wondering how you found my tiny little hair post in this huge sea of bloggers!

staceyjwarner said...

Oh my hair is so high maintenance...I'm growing it out which is a completely nightmare but it is platinum blonde so every six weeks i'm getting it bleached!

in fact my stylist is going to be on Tabatha's Extreme Salon makeover or whatever it's called.

much love

ZenMom said...

I went salon-free for about 4 months, just cuz. I finally broke down and had my appointment a week ago. Here's to another non-natural haired white woman roaming the streets.

Erin M. said...

Like Lee, I am cursed with Jewish hair. I have my own hair battles to wage, wish I could help you!

Menopausal New Mom said...

Hi Stacey, Oh that hair of yours sounds so high maintenance! In your shoes, I'd have 6 inches of dark brown roots with platinum ends!

Hi Zenmom, From what I'm hearing, 4 months between appointments is a long stretch, can't wait to get mine done on Thursday!

Hi Erin, Welcome aboard and thanks for the follow!

Yes, poor Lee, I'm hoping she does a post just on her hair so we can all tag along on her next hair appointment!

Frugal Vicki said...

To start, I am already loving you so don't take it personally, but I had to laugh as I am brand new and I am already expecting many many more posts to start with "a couple of blank ago, I saw an Oprah". This is number two. Next time I am overly stressed, I am pulling out the shot glass and playing a game.
Secondly, I have a bad issue. I have had one streak of gray on my left side that I have had since I was sixteen. According to my Dr. it is some poltergeist (remember the trilogy?) phenomenon where I was so stressed I got a gray streak. Whatever, it is a PITA. I can dye my whole head three times each Sunday and the next week it will still be a fat old gray patch again. And the mom of two under three, I am always sporting a ponytail. So now I am fat AND gray. By the time I get to menopause, you will be out. Can I come live with you?

Menopausal New Mom said...

Vicki, thanks so much for finding me! You crack me up and I don't know anyone who wouldn't benefit from a good laugh! Maybe you should streak the other side you so match, just a thought!