Monday, December 14, 2009

Could You Keep A Straight Face?

There are times when it's nice to live on a quiet street close to the neighbors. I'm not sure this little story is one of them though so I'll let you guys decide.

One sunny Summer afternoon, my mom and I were sitting on lawn chairs out in her backyard having a nice chat. Buddy next door is out in his yard too and because their backyards are side by side, he is less than 40 feet away working around his property in full view. Seems his wife is a big fan of hanging flower baskets and we notice that as he walks under one of them, a long flowering vine clipped the back of his head. This innocent little tap just happened to knock a bumble bee off that vine and right down the back of his collar and deep inside the back of his cotton shirt.


As we watch, we see him pause, wait for the confirmation as he feels it buzzing around inside his shirt and then the party begins! He starts peeling around his yard with his back arched, bellybutton pointing straight up at the sky squealing like a girl with his arms flailing. He's yelping and hollering that there's a bee in his shirt and yes, rather than calmly remove his shirt, he decides to try to outrun the bee instead.




Now, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know that trying to outrun a bee stuck INSIDE your shirt would be like trying to outrun one inside the back window of your car. It just ain't gonna work. After a few wild trips around his yard, he stops, starts hollering some more and we watch as that poor cotton shirt of his takes a hell of a beating. He grabs the front, pulls it apart and we watch all those shiny buttons go flying through the air in front of him. He tears the shirt off his back, throws it up into the air, and then goes running up the steps and into his house.

As hard a it was, yes, my mother and I kept a straight face sitting there taking in the entire escapade that lasted all of 30 seconds. Once we moved our butts up off those lawn chairs and into the house though, all bets were off. We quickly shut the windows and then laughed so hard and so loudly there were tears streaming down our faces.

BTW, no he's not allergic to bees, seems he just doesn't like them in his shirt. After seeing what happened to that poor cotton shirt though, we just thank God that bee didn't fall into his pants instead!
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51 comments:

Erin said...

That's so funny!

My Abby got stung once at the park. Which wasn't so funny...now she's paranoid about bees!

suzicate said...

Always funny uless you're the one running from the bee!

Too Many Hats said...

I probably would have kept a straight face from sheer shock in that 30 seconds, but certainly would have bust out laughing after that :)

Nancy@ifevolutionworks.com said...

Poor guy! I would not have been able to keep a straight face at all. I'm awful that way!

singedwingangel said...

Ok I would have laughed while telling him rather loudly TAKE OFF THE SHIRT DUHHHH

Kimi@SoManyKids... said...

Oh my gosh! Too funny. I'd have died watching that.

Buckeroomama said...

I don't think I could have kept from bursting out in laughter, let alone keep a straight face. This is from someone who once saw a girlfriend fall flat on her face on the sidewalk and almost burst her pants laughing, barely able to talk from trying to catch her breath in between gales of laughter, while trying to help said girlfriend back on her feet. (Good thing my friend was a good sport.)

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

That is hysterical!! I would be running like a mad too and laughing at myself!!

blueviolet said...

After the initial shock of having seen it wore off, I would have done the exact same thing you did...burst out laughing!!!

That One Mom said...

How do you not laugh?

Anita said...

I would have hollered over, "Do you need some help?" while trying to maintain my composure, and hoping that he could manage to say "no." Then I would have gone in the house like you and mom did,and crack up.
Funny story!

My Aimless Infatuation said...

It's so hard not to laugh,isn't it? I know because I have also been on the recieving end of the laughter many times. Glad the pants didn't come off? I guess he wasn't one of the better looking neighbors?LOL.

Nikia, May and da kids said...

I would have probably been the guy with the torn shirt in this story because stupid stuff happens to me all the time. Of course you would have laughed harder at me because I handle "surprise" situations poorly! Good stuff there.

May

ModernMom said...

LOL I don't know how you kept a straight face...maybe you should have offered to squirt him with a hose?? :)

VandyJ said...

Ya, I'd have laughed too, but inside like you did. That sounds like something out of a movie or cartoon, just too funny!

Heather said...

That poor guy! A scary moment for him and hilarious one for you and your mom. At least you went inside to shed your tears of laughter, I don't know if I could have lasted that long!

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

Poor guy! Too bad you didn't get it on youtube! LOL

I would've rolled with laughter but of course, inside the house like you did.

Then, I wouldn't have been able to look at him without wanting to laugh.

Just Another Momma said...

Oh my, I don't think I would have been able to stop from laughing. You both did a good job on that one.

Connie K said...

What a sight !! hahaha.. did he even see you guys watching ??

honeypiehorse said...

I would totally have laughed. Although, after the fact like you did. I would be caught up in empathic horror during.

Jackie said...

Ahhh...I bet he was embarrassed. I would have done the same thing you did though.

Diney said...

My Mum stood in a hornet's nest a few years ago and was stung all over her body and the only way to escape was to jump into the river fully clothed where my dad was fishing! At first he was cross that she had disturbed the fish with her bizarre behaviour!! She was quite poorly and needed hospital treatment, but we could laugh about it for years later!

Glad I found your blog - I had a baby at 45 too and went straight into menopause. :)

Trish said...

Haha your too nice! If he was my neighbor I would have been laughing and yelling run run run!! Hes very lucky to have a neighbor like your mom! What a sight!!

Heather @ Two Little Monkeys said...

I would not have been able to keep a straight face, I would of been laughing so hard.

Midday Escapades said...

Oh my gosh, I had to control myself from literally LOL at the coffee shop while reading this. Thanks for the laugh today.

Lisa said...

Thank you for stopping by and all your kind words and encouragement. It meant a lot to me.
Thanks too for this story, I needed a good chuckle today!

Ashley @ KiwisandCocktails said...

wow!
I may have laughed...well maybe just smiled unless I was scared for him! I am alergic and i dont even freak out like that! haah. Thank you for the image though!

Rachel Cotterill said...

I don't fancy having a bee inside my shirt, but honestly, I'm sure the bee was more worried than he was! Not sure I could've kept a straight face.

Helene said...

You're so much nicer than me. I would've run into my house ASAP and grabbed my Flip video camera and recorded it. Then I'd put it on Youtube.

Theta Mom said...

Poor little guy! But I would have been laughing, too!

shortmama said...

I would have died laughing!

yonca said...

Poor guy! But it is too funny! I would have laugh too!

gayle said...

That was so funny..I can just see it...am I bad for wishing that it got in his pants...:)

The Lucy and Dick Show said...

Funny story! Thanks for stopping over at my Blog!

Traci said...

Well, if my reaction reading is any indication, no! I could not keep a straight face.

Thanks for your kind words on my blog.
-)

Matty said...

Keeping a straight face might depend on which neighbor it was. I might even have reached for my camera.

Grandma Yellow Hair said...

What a funny funny post. So glad you found the time to share this with us. I set here laughing but so glad it was not in my shirt.
Oh my
Maggie

kyooty said...

that would totally have me rolling.

Mrs Montoya said...

I have no idea how you kept from laughing for a full 30 seconds. I wouldn't have been able to hold it for sure!

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

Oh, I was so afraid the bee would be in his pants and you'd get a full moon!

tattytiara said...

How sweet that you caught the prologue - that's bonus funny icing on top of the hilarity cake!

COUNTRY MOM said...

LOL... Thanks for sharing. That description you gave is... Priceless.

Blissed-Out Grandma said...

Sure, I'd keep a straight face long enough to see all the drama. Then, like you, I'd have to let loose with the laughter.

ethelmaepotter! said...

This is such a great story, and I can picture every second of it. Thanks for the laugh!

JennyMac said...

Oh, this made me laugh..its a great story unless you are the one in a tangle with the bee. LOL.

Betty Manousos:cutand-dry.blogspot.com said...

Funny but also dangerous!
hugs

Lissaloo said...

O man, I am still chuckling, that is too funny :)

MOMSWEB said...

I laugh at everything. Absolutely no straight face here!

Corrie Howe said...

I don't know how you gals where able to do it?!?!?!

Respectfully Yours said...

Too funny. Thanks for bringing me over to see this post. I have been away for a few days and needed to catch up.

I don't think I could have kept the laughing inside.

Jeanne said...

Lady, you know how to tell a funny story.