Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Just When You Think You've Heard It All......

This little story comes to us compliments of my folks who have been married for about 55 years. You'd think with that many years together under their belts, they would be out of surprises but you'd be wrong.

You see, the other day, mum was sitting in her favorite chair in the living room, probably with her laptop when dad walks into the room looking a bit sheepish and says "I just did something I've never done before".

Mum looks up and sees the shitty look on his face and wonders if she dares to ask "what?" but curiosity being the bitch it is, she says "What did you do?"

His reply catches her completely off guard.

"I just flushed my wallet down the toilet." Turns out that while my dad was straightening up after hitting that flush lever, his wallet popped out of his pocket and right down into the toilet bowl and out of sight with the cascade of rushing water.

Now, the good news, my dad is a plumber which saved him the embarassement of calling someone in to help him retrieve the thing, so he made a plan. Knowing that one flush wouldn't be enough to move the wallet out to the pipe on the street, he goes down to the basement and opens up the trap in the cement floor. His plan was to get mum to flush that toilet again while he waited downstairs watching for the water to shoot that wallet right out through the trap and into the sewer pipe. He thought if he moved fast enough, he could catch it on its way by.

So he hollers "Ready!", mum hits that toilet lever on cue but instead of flushing, the bowl fills up with water. Turns out that wallet hadn't made it all the way out of the toilet but was stuck.

She yells down that the toilet is plugged so upstairs he comes. He bails out the toilet bowl, tries to reach the wallet but no luck. Finally, he gives up, goes out to the garage and gets his toolbox. In he comes, the water gets turned off, bolts get unscrewed and that toilet comes up off the floor.  There wedged in the back of the trap is my dads sopping wet wallet.

A new wax seal goes down, that toilet gets bolted back to the floor, the water gets turned back on and mum goes back to her computer. Dad dries his wallet and goes back to whatever he was doing.

So there you have it, just another normal day at my folks house.

So tell us, what's the funniest thing that's been flushed down the toilet at your place?

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40 comments:

Gropius said...

Oh man, my mother recently dropped her cell phone in the toilet but don't think it made the flush.

Debbie said...

He he that made me laugh....oh boy he is so lucky he got that out!~ Thanks for sharing....

Dual Mom said...

That's the funniest thing ever Deb! And it sounds as though they were so calm about it!

Carol said...

Is there anything a toilet won't eat?

MiMi said...

I accidentally dropped the hall pass in the toilet when I was in h/s. Like we had this HUGE hall pass in Government class. I took it to the bathroom with me and it fell off the back of the toilet into the pissy water. Gross.

Angel said...

LOL.. that would be awful!

Babes Mami said...

I have had my cell phone fall out of my back pocket the exact same way not once but TWICE. I now take my phone out of my pocket everytime no matter what pocket it's in and set it far away from the potty.

Connie K said...

I have never heard of doing that before but my daughter did drop her Cell in the toilet before and cried after LMAO !! Great story

June said...

My watch fell in the toilet at Target... it was my pee so I fetched it out and washed thoroughly!!

Danielle said...

Oh man. I thought dropping my cell in the toilet was bad. Good thing he was a plumber. I'd been so embarrassed. LOL

That One Mom said...

Ever read my story about The Girl, some Q-Tips, and the cat? Yeah....

brainella said...

Gee, I thought I was the only one forever throwing my stuff in the toilet. My hairbrush, an earring, my book...never did flush any of it though. :)

adrienzgirl said...

Yeah with two ADHD little boys and an absent minded teenage daughter in the house, pretty much everything you can think of has made it's way into the toilet. Cellphones, LEGOS, army men, hot wheel cars, socks, underwear. Yep, I have seen all sorts of things.

Heather said...

Too funny! We just recently had to find what was clogging our pipes. Grandson must have slipped into the bathroom unnoticed, we found a toy screwdriver and jumbo lego!

Danielle said...

I work with about 50 plumbers, so I would be safe. However I have to see a lot of crack. :)

Debbie(single;complicated) said...

ha ha!! What an awful thing to drop down the toilet!!!!

Simply Suthern said...

He seemed pretty calm about it. With 4 youngins I have had to pull the toliet so many times. It's amazing how well a paper cup can plug a toliet. With long haired girls I continuously pull the sinktraps as well. Rings earrings and just plain ole plugged.

Heather said...

My parents said when I was little I hated my hair being brushed so I would try to flush all the combs and hair brushes.

NYCGAL said...

LMAO!!!!! This is so funny!! Thanks for the laughs!

Arizona Mamma said...

That's hilarious. I remember once when I was a little girl, my brother had this speedo style bathing suit. He was maybe 2. He crapped in it, and my mom was rinsing it in the toilet. Flush, rinse, flush, and so on. Well, one flush too many, and woosh...away went the little suit. I was like 5 but that is stuck in my memory.

Merri Ann said...

That is really funny.

I don't think I would have kept the wallet ... and I would have had to replace the contents as well.

My mom and dad have all sorts of funny things happen to them ... I could probably write a book. Recently, there older dog wondered from their yard in to the surrounding wooded area. Because some hungry coyotts had been around my mom thought my dad should look for the dog ... immediately. So she pretends she is in a small panic about it and urges my dad to leave his shower and get outside. Being the devoted husband, he puts on a t-shirt and heads outside ... naked from the t-shirt down. As he wades in to the brush she yells at him "You better put on some pants, I'm not going to pick ticks off of your "bells" ". All this would be ok ... they live in a very rural area without neighbors ... unfortunately the Fedex driver was walking up behind my mom ...

JoeyRes said...

I'm a dumb dumb that had my phone fall out of my pocket and into the potty. Thank goodness it was before I went and I retrieved it from clean water.

Mrsblogalot said...

HAA! My cell phone has seen so much toilet water it's scary. I don't know why I get so clumsy in there. (-:

Maureen@IslandRoar said...

When my son was about 4 he dropped the toilet paper holder in there. I can't believe it actually went down the hole but of course it stuck right past it. We couldn't get it from this side. So the Ex, who can fix ANYthing, had to do what your dad did, take it off the floor and bring it into the yard, where it still took another half hour to coax the TP holder out.
I never even knew toilets came off the floor...
your poor dad, lucky he could fix it himself!

yonca said...

OhMy.Glad he got it out. When Aria was 2 years old I cought him throwing hubby's self phone in to the toilet;)

suzicate said...

OMG, of all things to drop in the toilet. At least he was able to retrieve it!

Mammatalk said...

I dare to ask. But, I don't think a wallet has gone for a swim in our commode. Not yet anyway.

Mae Rae said...

how are you supposed to top a wallet?

The Mommyologist said...

I have almost dropped my IPhone in there on more than one occasion! That wouldn't be good. I think I lost a glove once too!

ethelmaepotter! said...

Oh, your folks are hilarious! And your story-telling...superb!

I think the only thing we've ever had flushed was a Matchbox car...and that was by my nephew, not one of my kids. I count myself awfully lucky!

3LittleMonkeys said...

Oh my, I would be freaking out! Good thing he's a plumber!

That's awesome, 55 years together!

Nothing crazy has been flushed here...yet!

Tammy said...

I literally laughed out loud when I came to the part that he flushed his wallet...OMG...that is too funny. I can picture it all! Thanks for the laugh, I needed that! :)

Matty said...

I like how she looks up at him like nothing would surprise her anymore. Being a plumber sure paid off.

How about a cell phone falling off the edge of your pants.

Secretia said...

My mother lost her diamond engagement ring down the toilet when I was a kid. We got it back.

Posh Totty said...

It is always a pot of moisturiser in this house, someone either Mr Posh or myself always manage to knock it down the toilet, its happened about five or six times now. (not the same pot I might add lol)

Erin said...

this is priceless. too bad you don't have it on video to submit. LOL!

mommymommymommy said...

During a middle of the night bathroom visit, i had to get new paper. I accidently flushed the toilet paper holder down the toilet!

I never told DH!

Anita said...

When are they getting their reality TV show? It's sure to be a hit!!!

gayle said...

Oh wow that is a lot of trouble to get his wallet. I have seen my husband do that when we put down tile. Nothing funny has been flushed down here but a friend of mine flushed her cell phone down at work!!

Pam said...

LMAO! Love it. Plumbers have one of the most shittiest jobs in the world.